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privTri Volpeon Extra @areon@icy.wyvern.rip
9mo
An interesting observation I made while running this account, and even way before, is that whenever I write about my views, people tend to assume that I must be unhappy all the time.

If you're one of them, please consider the following scenario:
Let's say you don't believe in any gods, because nothing about them makes sense to you, and consequentially decided to not participate in religions. You talk with other people about your views.
To someone of, say, Christian belief, your explanations will feel no different than mine about my animal identity feel to you. If you don't believe in God, how could you possibly be happy? You have no paradise to look forward to, no benevolent being to guide you and absolve you from your sins. You must clearly be misguided and need to be shown that God is the answer for true happiness.

I have always been very introspective. There's a constant part of me who observes my own existence and analyzes anything I do and think. I'm in a never-ending process of revising my views in the face of new insights, even if it means to give up a comfortable answer in favor of another one more aligned with my values.
To outsiders, this can be hard to comprehend. I want to be an animal, and right there is a way that allows me to "be" one. Why wouldn't I just accept it?
Long ago, I tried to become part of the therian community. I adopted their concepts and even had memories of moments that could've been shifts. And yet, it didn't work out because I couldn't shake the nagging feeling that I was making things up and lying to myself. Modern therianthropy is different, but all that has changed is that I now can't relate with it for other reasons. How could I possibly be happy if I rejected my values and pretended everything was fine?

In facing myself with brutal honesty, I'm staying true to myself. In recent years, I attained a profound sense of stability I never experienced before which has also positively affected my mental health. My negative feelings didn't vanish or became duller, but rather my understanding of them improved and that allows me to handle them better. I've never been further away from misery than today.